Addiction and Anxiety: Vision-Proof Churches

For this reason highly anxious churches may be considered "vision-proof." Like individuals caught in what Nakken calls "the negative reinforcement of an addictive personality,"¹³ vision-proof churches often get caught up in repetitious patterns characteristic of alcoholics or other addicts:

• I don’t really need people.
• I don’t have to face anything I don’t want to.
• I’m afraid to face life and my problems.
• Objects and events are more important than people.
• I can do anything I want, whenever I want, no matter whom it hurts.

Some "maintenance" churches are anything but healthy. Some are outright addicted—in a big way! Their attitudes reflect those demonstrated by alcoholics. Note the similarities!

• We don’t need people!
• If we don’t need people, we certainly don’t need more people!
• So what if we’ve got problems? We don’t have to face anything we don’t want to.
• We don’t care who gets hurt as long as we get our way and keep on getting what we want and doing what we’ve always done.
• We can do anything we want to and no one—not even God—is going to stop us.

Could "We’ve never done it that way before" be indicative of anxious congregations dominated by addictive emotional processes? Note that what is common to all these anxious responses is an inability to manage anxiety. A key capacity for anxiety management, as mentioned above, is the ability to talk, trust, and feel.

Whenever there is a breakdown of communication and the honest and forthright sharing of feelings and support, anxiety increases. The increased anxiety results in an emergent pattern of distrust. Without healthy trust, the decline of the church inevitably follows. Congregational health, like individual health, is rooted in healthy capacities to talk, trust, and feel. This must occur within oneself, in one’s relationship system, and, especially, with one’s God.

13. Nakken, 28.