An important issue is the use of language with respect to the names we place upon those persons or nations with whom we are in conflict. Elise Boulding, in her work with Nongovernmental Organizations (NGO's) at the United Nations, said that if she could shift her language—and use the word "stranger" rather than "enemy"—she found that it also changed her mind-set. With a stranger, there is always the possibility of moving from estrangement to reconciliation-whereas with an enemy there is by definition an adversarial relationship. It is surprising how much difference it makes for us to look upon the "stranger" as a person from whom we can learn, who perhaps shares some portion of the truth, and with whom we can work to produce a reconciliation of our differences. This enables us to operate out of hope rather than fear.

Recently a Civil War diary came to light in which the writer speaks of the worst day of his life, when "the inhuman enemy killed my own brother" Throughout history, humans have felt free to kill "inhuman enemies," so labeling the enemy is the first step to war. Look at some of the old propaganda posters and movies of the Second World War. In the l940's that language was describing the Germans and the Japanese who are now our friends. Today very similar language has been used to describe Islamists or the Taliban.

This is not to say that we do not have legitimate and powerful disagreements with other persons and other ideologies, but as the work of Roger Fisher suggests, there are models with which to deal with these conflicts, to keep that spiral of conflict from escalating to the level of violence.

At this point in the workshop, it might be helpful to look at our own perceptions of "enemy." We tend to deny that we could have personal enemies, and yet we are often surprised to discover that there are those we perceive as "other."

Through the following two exercises, people will have the opportunity to explore their experiences about having and being an "enemy." These exercises can be done by individuals writing in journals, or by pairs or triads sharing with each other. Then follow with a group discussion.